Purpose Driven Moms

About a year ago, I woke up at three o'clock in the morning with "Purpose Driven Moms" in my head. I jumped out of bed and ran to the computer to see if there was a domain name available. I was shocked to see that it was available, given the fact that it seems EVERY mom related .com is already taken! I bought it and went back to bed.

Over the last year, I've been trying to understand what "Purpose Driven Moms" looks like. Here's what I do know and what threw me out of the bed in the first place:

Women have a certain identity and then they become moms.  Becoming a mom is an amazing gift that comes with so much responsibility. Many of us want to be the BEST mom that we can be for our children. It's so easy for us to become consumed in living out the BEST mom role, that often times we slowly lose ourselves and our identity beyond our role as mom.

My belief is that while many may feel that their purpose in life IS to be a mom, we all have a divine purpose beyond that role. Being a mother may very well be the most important role a woman ever has, but she is also born with so many gifts that shouldn't go untapped!

One day, those precious little ones grow up, move out and start living their own lives. Many moms then take a step back and say "now what?" They've poured themselves so much into motherhood that they don't know who they are, what they enjoy, what they're good at and what they should fill their time with. Many know this phase in life as "empty nest syndrome!"

It's so easy to get stuck on auto pilot and just move through life filling time. I believe that we're all born with a purpose and it's our responsibility to seek all of it and pursue it. You've heard it before, but in your final days, how will you reflect on what you've done with your life? Did you live it to the fullest? Did you accomplish what you felt you were here to accomplish?

Purpose Driven Moms is about awakening women to take a look within and get to know themselves; identify their interests, their gifts, their dreams and desires. It's about supporting and empowering women to take action and implement change; shed what's not working and absorbing time and energy, then dedicating time to what's fulfilling and energizing by serving their purpose.

Purpose Driven Moms is about creating better balance in life. It's all about being intentional about what makes up one's life.

A Purpose Driven Mom is happy, healthy, thriving and offering the very best of what she has to offer her family.

That's a snippet, but I'm STILL trying to determine how I'm supposed to be spreading this message and impacting the lives of MANY moms! I'm open to feedback and ideas!

In Good Company - Suzanne Evans

Are you in good company?

I've been on ah-ha moment overload all weekend! I went to see Suzanne Evans live on the Help More People Tour in St. Louis. I have to say, she completely blew me away! WAY beyond my expectations (and I thought she would totally rock, but WOW)!

I'm sure I'll be discussing a lot of ah-ha moments moving forward, but one of the things I realized is how important it is to surround yourself with like minded people. And not just like minded people, but people of greatness; people that have achieved and accomplished thing things in life you're bound and determined to achieve.



(I have to say, I started this post on November 1st when I returned home from St. Louis and obviously, I was interrupted! Five month olds can do that pretty easily!)

Back to the point. I've been meeting some really incredible people lately; people that inspire me, challenge me, motivate me, and maybe a few that somewhat intimidate me. All of those things are good! I want to be more, do more.

Now that it has been a few weeks after seeing Suzanne, I have a little different perspective on my experience there. Honestly, it was bitter-sweet. I was excited to mingle among high achievers, doers; people that make a huge impact in the lives of others. I was inspired and encouraged to see their transformations in their business make-overs.

I'm realizing I should side-step here. Suzanne Evans works with "helpingpreneurs" (entrepreneurs that are in the business of helping others) to effectively market and monetize their passions. She's extremely gifted with what she does!

Anyway, back to what I was saying. I'm watching all of this transformation in the room throughout the day. I'm seeing people cry because the light bulb finally went off and they know exactly what they need to do moving forward in their business. It was exciting!

Toward the end of the day, I started to have a little bit of a meltdown. How embarrassing. I was quietly tearing up in the front row as I watched the last business make-over. It hit me - I'm living at about five percent of my potential...if that. Holy crap! What am I doing? I've been allowing fear to hold me back for some time now. I've been making excuse after excuse to not take action. I started to feel angry, frustrated. Before long, I was just plain PISSED!

I saw people with established businesses; people that have already taken that leap of faith and put themselves out there. I've seen their websites. I receive the newsletters of some of them. It was pretty amazing to see this other side; to see their stumbling blocks, their fears and hang ups. It was nice to see that I'm not the only one with fears, insecurities, excuses holding me back. Although everyone was at different stages in their journey of entrepreneurship, we could all relate to the emotions that come with putting ourselves out there.

I think we all realized that we now have each other to learn from, to gain support from and even business partnerships and alignments.

What I'm learning is that when you have a nudge to do something in your life; if you're truly passionate about something; take that leap of faith and go for it!

Make sure you're in good company. Find a way to minimize or eliminate the nay-sayers in your world. Attach yourself to people that build you up, encourage you, teach and mentor you. Align with people that have common interests, values, beliefs and motivations in life. It's amazing how quickly your life can change and you just begin to start finding ways to make it all happen!

Make It Happen Inspiration

I'm reading the September issue of O Magazine. This issue talks a lot about strong, powerful women. When I read the message from Oprah in the beginning of the issue, I thought "BAM, that's it. She said it! That's exactly what's rolling through my head."

"What I find powerful is a person with grace, with courage, with the confidence to be her own self and make things happen." - Oprah Winfrey

This quote articulates what I believe and what I envision for my Naperville Moms Network.

I know I haven't talked about that here yet. I've been trying to organize my thoughts and ideas on that for months now. It's pretty ridiculous that I have NOTHING on paper for it yet. It might have been a mistake (we'll see), but I went ahead and created the site, I haven't done much with it yet because I get so overwhelmed with where to begin. My mind is overflowing with ideas and aspirations. So much so, that I even have trouble verbally explaining everything I have in mind for NMN to where people will ACTUALLY understand the whole concept. I've gotta pull it together!

I can remember trying to pick a major and decide what I wanted to be growing up in college. The thought of determining a career that I would actually enjoy while also having a family one day really weighed on me. Can women really have it all? Can you have an enjoyable, successful career AND be a great mom and wife? My mom was an excellent example in my life. She's a teacher! It was nice because she had the afternoons off to be with us, holidays, summers. Every time we had off, she was there for us, yet she had a stable paycheck and was able to impact thousands of young lives. As a matter of fact, for many years, I wanted to be her. I thought what she did and the way she did it was the most amazing thing! Funny thing is, I let her talk me out of  following her path when I was going into college. She told me that she felt I could do something just as important and get paid better. Florida teachers are paid pathetically! It's a shame. I wish I knew the ratio of teachers leaving the classroom after a year or two down there when they consider their job versus what they're paid. It's really disgusting and sad when I think about it. Funny, Chicago area teachers are paid well. Had I known my future husband would have us living up here, I may have actually gone through with it! Ha!

Getting back to the point. I think it's difficult for women to decide what they "want to be when they grow up" when the consider the roles as "career woman" and "mom." How do you plan it out so that you can have it all? Maybe everyone doesn't hang on that question as much as I have, but for me, it has been a real struggle throughout my twenties.

There are those that don't really spend too much time on the question. They know that being Mom is number one. They work, then when it comes time to start their families, there goes the career. And that's okay, because all they've ever wanted is the husband, precious children and possibly the white picket fence. "I was born to be a mother" they say. "That's what I was put on this earth to do." That may very well be so and not to say that there's anything wrong with that mindset.... The one thing to keep in mind is that those precious children grow up and begin their own lives. What's left for that mother when their children leave the nest for college or marry off? Empty nest syndrome - I sure as heck didn't make it up! Women then struggle to determine their purpose, where they're needed and how they contribute. They're whole world has been wrapped up in their children and now what?

On the other end of the spectrum, we have those that are so eagerly career driven, that they have an entourage of people (nannies, grandparents, childcare centers, etc.) handling the daily care of their children. They might see the kids when they wake up or before bed, but don't always have the opportunity to share meals, make it to their sporting events or extra curricular activities. They aren't fully plugged into their children's lives. The years seem to pass by in a blink. All of the sudden, the children are off to college and there's no real relationship. The parental influence is not as significant as those that have had a hands on role in their child's upbringing.

Let me just say that in any scenario discussed, there's no judgment here. That's not the purpose. These are extreme stereotypes that exist in today's society. Obviously, not every mom falls into one box or the other. There's gray. I'm no psychologist, so I'm not trying to over analyze why people choose the path that they do, I'm just saying that I've seen or witnessed all of the extreme scenario's in the lives of people close to me. I've seen the damage it can have on women when they hit "mid life" and wish they would have done things a little differently.

We are all influenced in our beliefs about what we think our roles are and how we should fulfill them. I'm not trying to change that. I would like to bring an awareness to today's women, mothers in particular, about finding that balance, living at our individual optimum and truly having it all! I believe it. We really can have it all!

It's a matter of being mindful of our own needs. It's about recognizing our gifts, strengths, passions and purpose in our own lives. We only have one go at this (as far as I know)! We never know how much time we have. People have a tendency to put things off that they've always wanted to do, for a time that's better or when they have more money, whatever. We make excuses for why we don't have the things or elements in our lives that we truly desire. I'm not talking about material things either. That's just one piece. I'm talking about taking risks, putting ourselves out there when we're unsure, but have a longing for something. I'm talking about finding the time and making a few sacrifices for the hobbies and special interests in our lives. I'm talking about consciously making our individual health a priority. I'm talking about looking in the mirror and seeing what's really there. Not on the surface, but the whole person. Your spirit.

If we can be in touch with our true, authentic selves, I believe we can, as Oprah would say it, "live our best life." We can be better wives, moms, sisters, daughters, friends, teachers, mentors, and so on. The possibilities are endless! We can go and do things we would have never dreamed possible if we just allow ourselves the opportunity to dream a little bit and believe. Ultimately what I want, is that at the end of the day, not matter what age, we can sleep peacefully and comfortably in our own skin knowing that we're truly living. We're making it happen!